Larry Norman goes Home

Larry Norman(1947-2008)

Larry Norman is one of the fathers of the Christian music industry. In particular he was one of the first rock artists in Christian music. He was playing rock music when churches still though it was of the devil. It's because of people like Larry and many others that I have a job today. His pioneering work opened the doors for countless bands that populate the industry today. I met Larry once about 10 years ago. He was a nice guy although quite eccentric. I didn't really know who he was at the time but have since learned about what he did for the Christian music industry. Larry went home to be with his heavenly father on Sunday after a long battle with heart disease. Larry will be missed but his impact will forever remain.

Larry knew he din't have much time left so he left a farewell message on his website:

Goodbye, farewell, we'll meet again
Somewhere beyond the sky.
I pray that you will stay with God
Goodbye, my friends, goodbye.

Once upon the Oscars

The Oscars were on last night and I read today that they were the least watched in the 80 year history. I guess I was one of the few that did see it which is funny because I really had no reason to watch. I have not seen any of the films that were nominated so I really didn't care who won. I also have a bit of an issue with awards shows in general. How is it that something which is subjective, as art is, be objectively judged and awarded? It seems silly to me. I understand honoring and apreciating art that is well liked but when it comes down to it aren't these awards shows just more publicity? I think the force behind these awards shows is simple, it's money. The people who are nominated get hired more and sell more. The films or cd's make more money which is why it is so sought after. I understand that there is a history there and it's like being inducted into a club of sorts if you win but do we really need twenty different awards shows for the film and music industry? I also understand that these shows can be entertaining. I used to love watching the Oscars and would get all into it. I think maybe when it started it was more about honoring excellence in your craft but now it is a popularity contest driven by money. All that being said, there was one bright moment from this year. The little guy showed up out of nowhere and won a big prize.

A film called Once, which I have not seen yet but have heard about from Glenn and Jeremy, won the award for best originial song. This film was made 2 years ago on a super small budget of $100,000 and took 3 weeks to make. The film is about a guy and a girl who are both struggling musicians. They meet and try to help each other write songs for a demo so they can get a record deal and in the process fall in love. The songs in the film performed by them are very beautiful. The story is a bit about how these people stay true to their art and their dreams. It was nice to see a small budget "art" film be honored at the Oscars. Here is a clip of their performance at the show. I'm assuming from the ratings that not to many have seen it.

The best are back

I'm excited! We have been off the road for awhile now and have another month at home with not much to do. So, there hasn't been a lot lately to get excited about but today i found something. Ok, I'm pinning all my hopes and dreams on this but it is something fun to look forward to. I just found out that two of my favorite bands will both be releasing new albums this year. U2, who is my favorite band, just released a 3D movie at the IMAX which I had the pleasure of experiencing not too long ago. That made me remember why I loved their stuff so much and why I loved their live show which I have seen twice. The problem is U2 only tours when they have a new album and there is usually quite a bit of time in between. However, I am pleasantly surprised that they will be releasing their newest masterpiece sometime in October of this year. I am of course excited to hear the new stuff but even more excited about the possibility of seeing them live again.

As if U2's new album wasn't enough, Coldplay is also set to release their latest in June. In many ways I see Coldplay as a younger version of U2.
They also have a great live show that I was able to experience and great records that I love. Coldplays new album will be called Prospekt. An interesting side note is that the uber talented and longtime U2 producer/ collaborator will be producing on both of these albums. Daniel Lanois will also be working on the U2 album, teaming up with Eno again to form an unstoppable force in music producing. I look forward to catching Coldplay live after this new album as well.

Ok, I guess it would only be fair and appropriate to give a shameless plug for the forthcoming Downhere album as well. I guess it will be competing with U2 but Downhere's has a month head start with a September release, hopefully. I haven't heard all the songs yet but the ones I have are great as usual and this new project will be another must have. Downhere is pretty good live too. I've heard they are on of the best sounding bands live, huh.

CH Spurgeon

One guy who I’ve always heard a lot about in theological discussion s but never really knew much about was Charles Spurgeon. I’ve never read any of Spurgeon’s writings but I thought I should at least do a little research and learn a bit about him, so as to be informed. Since information is so readily available these days on the old interweb I really have no excuse to not know at least a little bit about Spurgeon.

Spurgeon was 15 when he came to be a believer. He had a bit of a Damascus experience like the apostle Paul did. He was on his way to meet someone when a bad snowstorm hit. He went in to a Methodist church to get out of the cold, presumably, and that is where his heart was converted. Only 4 short years later, at the age of 19, Spurgeon was given his first pastorate in London at the famed New Park Street Chapel. It didn’t take long to see that preaching was Spurgeon’s gifting. His sermons were printed and published each week and his readership as well as his congregation quickly grew. Spurgeon wasn’t preaching anything new he just did it with passion and with an authority that he took from the Scriptures. It wasn’t long before the congregation outgrew their building and had to relocate. The congregation had grown so big in fact that the only place that would hold them was surrey music hall. Spurgeon was regularly preaching to 10,000 people every Sunday. The astounding thing about that to me is the fact that this was before sound amplification was invented. That means that Spurgeon was preaching to 10,000 people without a microphone and sound system. I’m assuming he had a pretty big voice and learned how to project it well. There were even a couple times in which he preached to over 20,000 people with no amplification. As a sound engineer and a person with ears that is amazing to me.



Spurgeon had an amazing preaching and teaching career. In his lifetime he preached over thirty six hundred sermons and published 49 volumes worth of commentaries and other writings. Spurgeon is highly regarded in the reformed theological world and many denominations as well. His churched is considered one of the first “mega churches”. However, his church in no way resembled many of the “mega churches” of today. People were not drawn to Spurgeon’s church because of a seeker sensitive watered down gospel. They came because Spurgeon preached the truth with authority and passion because he preached from the ultimate authority, which is God as revealed in his Word. Spurgeon didn’t succumb to the humanism of his day but rather held fast to the truth.

I think Spurgeon is a great example for today. We can still have a huge impact on culture without sacrificing the truth or diluting it to please people. Our culture, and sadly much of our church, has become so completely man centered. Everyone is so concerned about what people will think that they completely ignore what God thinks or says. We need more Spurgeon’s and others like him. We need people with integrity who will stand up for truth and fight for it. Ultimately we know God is sovereign and in control. He is raising up servants every day to glorify Himself. God used a simple snowstorm to bring Spurgeon to Him and through Spurgeon His kingdom was greatly multiplied. The fight for truth is long and hard but God assures us a victory. Spurgeon understood that and I hope I can fully hold to that too.

Jake Shimabukuro rocks the ukelele

I saw this guy on Conan last night. I have always liked the song but for some reason I was really moved by his perfomance of it on the ukelele. It was simple but profound somehow. Conan was also impressed. He came over afterwards and told him that it was probably the best thing he ever had on the show as far as music and he was very sincere. So maybe it will move you too or at least you will enjoy i hope.

Colbert teaches Sunday School

I was flipping through the channels last week when I was fortunate enough to land on the Colbert report. I don't think I've ever actually watched more than a couple minutes of this show before but i just happened to watch it at what may have been one of his best moments. After watching this segment I had to do some research on Mr. Colbert because I was so intrigued by what he said. It turns out that Stephen Colbert actually is a Sunday School teacher and has been for a while. He is a devout catholic and also quite a learned scholar of sorts. He is the youngest of 11 children in an Irish Catholic family. His father and 2 of his brothers were killed in a plane crash when he was younger. Colbert got his start by working as Steve Carels under study in the Groundlings improv group in Chicago where he also met Amy Sedaris. He had his big break when John Stewart took over the daily show and gave him a regular spot on the show. That in turn led to the spinoff which is now The Colbert Report.

It's very interesting to me how people like Colbert negotiate their faith in a faithless industry. His character that he plays on The Colbert Report usually would just make jokes and act stupid in response to someone like Zimbardo. I think Zimbardo just pushed his button too far and he couldn't let him slide on his absurd statements. I thought He responded briliantly and the end of the interview was one of the funniest things I've seen in a long time on TV. So, I think I'm gonna keep a closer I on Mr. Colbert now and enjoy his show a little more often maybe.

Over that Hill

Time is ticking. The big 30 is just around the corner. Am I ready? Am I where I thought I would be in life? The answer is probably no on both counts but does that really matter? Honestly, I haven't even given it much thought until now. I don't understand why people get so depressed or anxious about 30. I think we put these cultural mile markers in life that have certain connotations and for some reason turning 30 has a bad one for most people. I guess it is suposed to mean the end of our youth or the end of dreams for some. In reality though 30 is just the same thing as 29 or 25 or 15 except we are supposed to be a little bit wiser with more life experience under our belt. I'd rather look at this "milestone" a bit more positively. This is the begining of maturity right ha. I still feel young but I also feel like I know way more than I did 10 years ago. What I know now is this, there is so much I don't know. The more I learn in life and understand things or experience things, the more I realize how much I don't understand and how much there is in life to know and experience. I'm looking forward to my thities and what God has for me. I get to watch my daughter grow and I get to love her and my wife evry day. I can't ask for much more than that and yet I still get so much more. So i say, 30, bring it on. I look forward to it and I'll thank God he's brought me this far.

New Year, new stuff

The year is new hooray, but i am the same boo. The changing of the year this time around was one of the most unenjoyable moments of my life sadly. The day started as any great day should by spending 16 hours driving in the smelly dirty van. We were trying to get to virginia before midnight so we could at least be in the hotel and watching the ball drop on tv or something. Instead we were about 30 minutes away at 11:30, we had just pulled off the interstate to finish the last 30 miles on a windy 2 lane highway when i tries to double check the directions. As i looked at the mapquest directions while going a slow safe 35 miles an hour I passed the sign that changed the speed limit to 25 miles an hour. It was also at that same time that I passed a police car that aparently had nothing better to do on new years eve at 11:40 than to pull me over for going 35 in a 25 and give me a nice ticket. So if that wasn't enough to ruin my night and the fact that i wasn't with my wife and baby but instead in a smelly van all day, when I tried to call jess at midnight my phone cut out right at midnight. So now i can only hope that things get better from here for the new year.

So far things have been better, we've been home a bit and I am enjoying that a lot. I put tile in our bathroom which was quite a big job and is still not totally complete but I am happy with the results. Cali is growing and scooting all over so we are having to keep a watchful eye on her. Jess is keeping herself busy with live beautiful and doing a great job. So that is where we are.

One thing I've realized about doing this blog is that it is difficult. I am a bit of a perfectionist so it bothers me when things are not quite right or not to how i want it to be. It is hard for me to write just for the sake of writing. When i write I want it to be good and have something interesting and originial to say. It is also hard to be inspired enough to sit down and write something out. I know i need to write more because it is a good thing to do and it is also good to not be so uptight about what I write and worry so much about how perfect it is. I do know that what I write will never be perfect or great but i will still try to make it at least a little interesting.

Happy 16th of january!

Friends and Family

This Christmas season I have been given a gift that is worth far more than money could buy. I have been given the gift of time. Time well spent with my family and dear friends. We have been able to spend a good amount of time here in california this year visiting with some old friends and spending time with family i have not seen for a while. I really try not to take for granted these times. I was able to spend some time with my grandparents on this trip which was extra special because it very possibly could be the last time I see them. They are getting older and are not in good health and they live in northern california which we don't get to go to very much. I hadn't seen them in alomost 7 years and they had changed so much. It was hard to seem them like that but I'm glad we were able to spend the time with them and they were able to meet Jess and Cali. The thing that got me and made me a little sad was the thought that the good old days of sitting at their house at christmas and hearing them and all my aunts and uncles laughing while me and all my cousins ran around is over. It was as if my childhood had finally dissapeared and I was faced with the fact that I really am an adult and responsible for so much more. It's not a bad thing and I welcome this new season of my life and am enjoying it. It's just hard to say goodbye even when it's a nostalgic notion we are saying goodbye too. I hope I do get a chance to see my grandparents again before they are gone but if I don't see them here I know I will see them again in heaven.I will have an eternity to spend with them and make up for lost time.

I have also had the pleasure of spending time with some great friends that I haven't seen in awhile as well as some cousins who I haven't seen in several years. One of the hard things about working in a touring band is being away from family and friends so much. I just have to trust that God still redeems that time away from them and that I can have peace in knowing that I will have eternity to spend with them in the best place there is. As for now on this side of eternity i will cherish the few times I do have with these people and thank God for them. I hope that whoever is reading this will do the same. Enjoy the time God has given you with your loved ones and never take it for granted.

Live Beautiful

Howdy,

it's been a little while since I've been here and I have lots of good excuses but will not bore you with them. Most of my time away was spent in pennsylvania with jess' family. We had a great time and got to enjoy some snow while we were there. Another thing that has happened recently, and the reason for my return from blogging hibernation is a new business. It feels weird calling it a business because business sounds too profesional or something or too self important maybe, hey i own a business ha. Anyways, it's really Jess' business but I offer as much support as I can and I've also been appointed, by her, as the mr. marketing guy. The fact that I have next to no marketing experience makes this interesting but hey how hard can it be. Ok I guess now would be a good time to actually tell you what the business is. Drumroll.... Tote Bags. Ok that was probably anticlimatic so lets puty it this way. My beautiful wife who is much more talented than I has begun hand crafting unique and fashionable tote bags. But wait theres more, the tote bags are just part of it. We, she, wanted to make it something that was encouraging to women as well and that has a positive message to share. We, she wanted a way to express the beauty she has inside her and in turn wanted to encourage women to do the same. So, Live Beautiful was born. The idea is to tell women, You are beautiful so Live Beautiful. I'm very proud of my wife for taking on something like this and doing such a good job at it. This "business" is not something we are doing to get rich cuz that aint gonna happen. It's a way to fullfill three things. We can hopefully make a little extra money, Jess gets to express her creative side, and we are actively engaging the world with a great message and encouragement. This is the spot in the blog where I put the link to the site so you can all go look and say wow those totes really are great I should buy one or 2 or 10. So here it is tolivebeautiful.com So there is my marketing, I just marketed to you. Hopefully you don't feel used but rather thankful that I was able to share such wonderful information about how to obtain a unique handmade tote bag. Oh, make sure you tell all your friends too that would be real swell.

Enough marketing, I promise i will try to write some new stuff more often and I promise my wife is on me about writing more new stuff all the time.

What's Happenin

Four score and seven years ago I wrote a blog. It was an ordinary blog not unlike many others. It wasn't anything special but it was indeed a blog, which was the last of it's kind until this present time. I have many excuses for neglecting such a faithful blog but I will spare you. My blog has always been here for me but I, sadly, have not always returned the favor in kind. I always think about it with fond memories and want to share something but alas I become distracted by all the things in life that I probably could have been blogging about. All this to say that I will try to write when I can or when I feel so inspired. However, there may be times of drought and abscense so bear with me.

Things of note since my last posting:

My daughter is growing up way too fast. She is rolling over and starting to sit up on her own. She has already been to more states and experienced more things in her 5 and a half months than many do in a lifetime.

The band has been busy finishing up our fall tour. This weekend is the last 3 shows and then we have quite the hiatus through December. I am struggling to find something to occupy my time during our time off, preferably something that generates some income so if there are any ideas on that please do tell. This time of year gets busy in the personal life away from the band as me and jess try to juggle time between pennsylvania and california to spend time with our families for the holidays. We are excited for all of our extended family to spend time with cali.

I've had an idea in my head for a bit of a direction I might take this blog, at least for some of the time. I love to study many various topics and issues from philosophy and theology to history and science. I think there is a real lack of understanding about so many basic principles in all these areas, which makes it difficult to come to a comprehensive and complete worldview. I believe that part of the problem is that many times these issues or ideas are not properly explained or are spoken of in a way in which the average person can't even begin to understand. So, my idea was to maybe start presenting some of these topics in a very basic way so that anyone could understand them. Now I'm no scholar or teacher but I think it would be fun to try and maybe I will even learn more about these topics myself. In fact, if anyone has any suggestions about topics they would like to know about please let me know. Alright, that's all I've got for now. Until next time.

Happy Reformation Day!

This may be a little late in the day but it's still Oct. 31 as I write this. So today is the day that millions of little kids roam their neighborhoods in pursuit of tasty little treats. It's also a day that gives adults an excuse to dress up in a way that would never be allowed on a normal day. Are these things bad? No, I don't think so. What I do think is sad though is the fact that very few people know or remember or even care really about the world changing event that took place on this day in history almost 500 years ago. On October 31, 1517 in a little town in Germany called Wittenberg, Martin Luther started something that would change the course of history. Martin Luther was a man who stood for what was right and true. He saw how the church of his day had strayed far from the teaching of the word of God and how dangerous and wrong that was. To stand against a force as strong as the church was, at that time, impressive and courageous to say the least. The church had distorted the gospel and was abusing the trust of it's members. The church had become something that existed to glorify itself and it's leaders rather than glorifying God. As a result, the church gained an immense amount of power and influence and was seen as the only bearer of truth and the only way to get to God. When Martin Luther nailed his 95 theses to the door of that church in Wittenberg, he was not calling for a new idea or a new religion. Luther was calling the church to account for what they were teaching because it was not based anywhere in Scipture. Luther was trying to bring the church back to the truth of the gospel as it is revealed in the Scriptrures, as it had been since the beginning. Luther's boldness proclaimed the gospel of grace loud and clear and shined the light of truth to people who were under a cloud of darkness. Luther paved the way for other brave men to stand up for truth and to reclaim the gospel for what it really is. Many men followed his footsteps and transformed Europe and eventually North America and much of the world. Luther was just an ordinary guy just like me whom God used to proclaim His truth. I can only pray that I can be as bold and as willing as Luther and many others to proclaim it as well.

Has Jesus Emerged?

This week I’ve been home and have had the ability to spend a lot of good time reading and reflecting. It has been a joy to get back into some good study of the Bible and the deep truth that it contains. I love the Bible because it is God revealing himself to us, it is the creator of the universe telling us about himself and explaining to us the way things are. I believe the Bible is the very foundation for everything and is really the only way for us to truly know anything. We could not make sense of this world without knowing God and we can’t know God without Him revealing Himself in His word. I believe that the Bible and only the Bible gives the preconditions of intelligibility, which means that it is the only thing that gives a consistent, coherent foundation for what we know and how we know it. For example, without the Bible you could not give a rational explanation for why we have morality or laws of ethics. People try to give an explanation but upon deeper review it is inadequate and illogical. All this to say I believe that the Bible is very valuable and I take it very seriously which is why I am deeply saddened when people who claim to want to follow it think that it is ok to try and change it or use it to try and make it say something it doesn’t. This is something that has happened since time began and probably always will as long as sinful men live. I think whenever an issue arises we need to go to scripture first and see what God says about it and to faithfully with an open heart let scripture speak for itself. We cannot impart our ideas into the text we can only take from it what it really says. There is sooo much more to say on this as it is something that men have spent their whole lives discussing and studying but I wanted to give a brief synopsis on my view of the Bible and it’s authority in our lives for everything.

I think it is important whenever we hear a sermon or someone speak or read a book to check what the person is saying with scripture. Is what this person is saying lining up with what God says in his word? If what they say goes against sound Biblical teaching we need to call them on it. We need to do it in a loving way with the goal of unity and restoration but it needs to be dealt with and not left to get worse. I think many of the problems in the church today are a result of men failing to teach what the Bible really says and good men doing nothing about it.

I can’t go into all the different erroneous theological views at this time nor would it be very fruitful here. However, there is one in particular that I would like to highlight at this time. I think is a dangerous one because it is so attractive and it really appeals to the modern culture. I’m talking about the Emergent movement. Don’t worry, I’m not going to bash these people or engage in attacking them personally. In fact I think I share common ground with them in their criticism of the modern “seeker sensitive” modeled churches. However, that is as far as it goes. It’s when they move from the criticisms and what wrong to their prescription on how to fix it that I feel is not always Biblically sound. I think many of them have an honest desire to follow Christ and to be a light in a dark world but I think they have changed the truth to be more appealing or more relevant to today’s culture and in so doing have lost all relevance. I think many people who have jumped on board the emergent movement don’t really know what it is that they believe and why but are more there because it’s the new exciting thing. I know I haven’t given any specifics yet as to why I feel this way and in what way that they are in error, which brings me to this. Here is an article that is brilliantly written by a pastor named Reid Monaghan. I think in it he does a great job of laying out the issues and showing why we need to be aware of what is going on. Reid gives a strong Biblical analysis and is very fair and loving in his approach to the emergents.

I can’t stress enough how worth your time it is to read it and to start asking your own questions and then seeing what God really has to say about it all. Has God changed? Is what he said then still applicable now? The Bible is clear and answers with authority and you can be confident in it, as it is the very word of God. Please check out Reid's article here for a more in depth look.

Fall Touring

We've just finished the first and longest leg of our fall tour. It has been a lot of fun hanging out with Jason and Taya Gray again and this time we have Lanae Hale joining us as well. We are extremely blessed to have been on a bus for this trip which makes it feel like a school trip with all your friends or something. We even got to take a sightseeing trip to Mt. Rushmore. This tour although fun with friends has been challenging as well. We have a full production which is fantastic but it takes a lot of work to put it all up and tear it down every day. I think everyone has worked together really well though and things have run fairly smoothly. We have definitely had a few hiccups and problems but hopefully nothing that the audience would notice or ever really know about. I think the show this fall is the best it's ever been which is why it is a bit sad and frustrating that more people aren't there to see it. The crowds have been fairly small but the ones who are there have been very gracious and had a good time with us.

One great thing about this tour so far for me is the fact that I get to have my family with me. I can't even begin to tell you what a huge blessing that is. I remember dreaming and praying about what it would be like to travel and do this job with my family and now it is a reality. I was sitting on the bus, which is another thing we have prayed a long time for, and I looked over at my wife on one side and my beautiful sleeping daughter on the other and I was filled with so much gratefullness tha t I was in that moment with them. Another cool thing this week was that it was Jess' birthday. We had a fun little celebration on the bus after the show with a cake and all.

This job is very difficult sometimes and we are taken away from family and friends and the normalcy of life so often. Often times I feel so worn out but after a week like this I feel so grateful for where God has me. I love the people I get to work with and feel so blessed to share life with them and to share this crazy life in particular.

To see some great pics from this week check out jess' facebook here.

Cali giraffe

This is our little giraffe taken yesterday by my lovely wife at home. I miss them a ton but am on my way home to them tonight. Cali's getting bigger and may be getting her first teeth but we aren't sure yet. I think she's pretty darn cute.

California

This week I am in the land in which I was birthed. California, as usual, is treating us great and the weather is perfect. We are only here for a few days but are managing to zigzag up and down the state getting very little sleep and squeezing in a few rock shows while were at it. We have been presented with many technical challenges as is always the case when we fly but we've been able to overcome them and have some good shows. I love coming back here but it is always so strange now. I grew up here and know the state very well so it is very odd to come back as a visitor. It still feels somewhat like home because it always will but i actually almost feel out of place now sometimes when i come. Next week we start our fall tour which will be a lot of work and I'm fighting trying to get over a cold. I hope we have enough time to recover before the craziness starts. I have a couple more days to spend here in my favorite state and then I get to head home and be with my 2 favorite girls. Hopefully I'll be able to post some more interesting topics and thoughts soon.

Still Here

Hey,
don't worry I haven't given up on this blog yet.I've been in pennsylvania these last couple weeks and without good access to the world wide web. It has been a great time to relax and enjoy watching the beautiful fall colors slowly come to fruition. There are few places that rival the beauty fall like PA. Maine is rumored to have amazing fall colors and I will see it first hand this weekend. I leave tomorrow at 6am to head to the airport and off to Maine for probably less than 20 hours. I will then finaly head home for about 3 days until I am off once again to my home state of California for a few days. It's been a busy summer and the fall is no different. It's been nice to have this time to relax and refresh a bit before things get crazy again. I'm really looking forward to the holidays when things slow down a bit. I'll try to post some more soon about the things I've been reading and learning. Now I must return to my family and enjoy them as much as I can for a few more hours before I leave.

Good bye Washington

Today is somewhat sad because we are leaving the beautiful and idyllic getaway that we have been at for almost 2 weeks. We have had a great time here and the guys have even managed to begin work on somke great new songs. Things are sounding good. So it is with a bit of sadness that we leave but i also feel renewed and ready to take on what lies ahead for the rest of the year. It won't be too hard at first since mer and Jess are heading to Pennsylvania for another week off to rest and enjoy family and hopefully cooler weather. I hear that it has finaly rained in Nashville and cooled off a bit so hopefully by the time we return the weather will be bearable. I think after this week I am really looking forward to the fall and all it has to bring. We will be on a tour with our good friend Jason Gray and it should be a great show. I think we were all feeling a bit road weary before we came up here but are now a bit renewed and ready to pick up the fight where we left off. Now the time has come to bid adieu to this place until next time. We love you winthrop.

To live well

As I reflect on this week I feel renewed and encouraged. The irony is that this week I had an encounter with pain and although it hurt, as pain does, it was good. I found that pain and suffering can bring peace. It's in our pain and suffering that we are perfected and strengthend. We are so afraid to face our fears and problems because of the threat of pain. However, it is only when we allow ourselves to feel the pain and sufering and confront our demons that we can begin our recovery. I think many of us have been handicapped by the notion in the church that as Chritians we aren't supposed to feel pain or suffer. Often we are led to believe that we are to always be happy and filled with joy. The problem is that we live in a fallen world. The reality is that there will always be pain and suffering. We can't avoid it, the question is how do we deal with it. Do we bury it and pretend like we don't have problems and everything is fine? Or are we brave enough to be honest and admit that we hurt and that we struggle?

This issue is something I've thought about for awhile but never really done anything with it. Authenticity is something I've always desired but my fear of confronting and feeling the pain in my life has kept me from it. This week I had an experience with the pain of my life and it was a revelation. Was it hard? yes. Was it worth it? absolutely. Accepting the pain and being willing to walk in it allows me to know and accept who I really am. It's only when I'm willing to be broken and deal with it head on that I can live authenticly and be able to give myself away, my true self. When this happens there can be true intimacy with my wife, my friends, my family and everyone in my life.

I'm sure I will have more to say on all this in the future but I'm just flushing out what I have learned and felt this week. I'm on a journey and can only pray for courage to face my life with honesty and to live more authentically with those in my life.

On the road follow up

This week I find myself basking in God's glory and grace once again. I am very blessed to be able to spend time with my family and friends in one of the most beautiful and amazing places in washington state. We are at our anual artists retreat up in the mountains at one of the most luxurious places I'll ever get to be. This place would be a five star resort if it wasn't privately owned by some of the nicest people you would ever meet. So that is why posting has been off for a few days. I've been trying to relax and reflect and soak in everything we are lerarning up here. I will post more soon on the things that have been going on here but for now I wanted to give a quick update on one of my last posts. I asked the question of why i do what I do and tried to come up with a good reason. I wrote it at a time that was difficult and when I was tired and maybe a bit frustrated at the circumstances. We were on the road to go do a show for free 10 hours away, outside on one of the hottest days of the year. The set up was gruelling and the day was a hard one. It reinforced the question of why. What were we here for, why did we make that sacrifice? A couple days after the show we received an e-mail from the head of the radio station that brought us in to play. His e-mail was more timely and needed than he may ever know. The e-mail is as follows:

Let me tell you a story. One night, in a small city in the midwest, about 1500 people came to an outdoor amphitheatre to see a couple of new artists most, admittedly, had never seen live before. In fact, most admitted they had only heard one song on the radio from these performers at best. They came for the atmosphere, or because previous acts who had performed there were more well-known, or just because it was date night or something to do for free with the kids.

Then a shocking thing happened. The concert began. First two songs- still sitting on their hands, but starting to lean forward. Third song- now fully engaged and starting to sway. 5,6,7 songs in- riveted to the testimony and the music of this sweaty man named Jason Gray.

Fast forward ten minutes. By now everyone is wondering if the next band could possibly be as good as what they just heard. It was Friday night and the stars were out. Time for some mellow music and coffee right? The river was running deep just 20 feet behind the stage, a wedding reception was being held in white tents just down the Riverwalk. The mixture had everyone as relaxed as they could be... and then the music startled. That's right, startled. The first song was a rocking number that pushed adrenaline through the mostly middle-aged crowd and featured a low lead singers voice that was engaging and electric. This was worth staying for. It was written on every face.

Fast forward 5 minutes. The second lead singer opens his voice. Shock. Total, utter shock. People who brought friends turned with an "I told you so" look, but not matter. The newbies just stared, jaws dropped, not believing a band already impressively tight could be fronted by not just the guy with the husky voice, and accomplishment in it's own right, but this ridiculously perfect pitched second voice. For 55 more minutes they cheered the drummer, jumped with the bass player, hopped, swayed, raised their hands, pumped their fists... but they mostly just stared at the Canadian in cropped pants and a drenched white shirt.

By the end of the night the rock stars who need money, and their friend Jason had given much more than they would possibly receive that night. They absolutely, clearly pointed to Jesus, while simultaneously rocking the riverwalk crowd. In the end a tuxedoed wedding party member walked over, listened for a few minutes, bought a green t-shirt, and tossed it to his new bride.

I think a lot of lives started a new chapter that night.

Thanks for making it happen. Please give our deepest thanks to Jason and all 4 guys from the band. They traveled far and worked hard and we do not take it lightly. But man did they make some serious fans on Friday night. I literally had a guy turn to me 2 songs in to say "I'm convinced- this is my new favorite band!" They were absolutely spot on. Just fantastic.

Some great pictures are online at kxoj.com. If you need the originals let me know.

Thanks for partnering with us,
Bob

Thanks Bob for your words of encouragement and thank you to everyone who came out. Also most importantly thank you Jesus for using us even when we weren't willing.