Here I am, once again, trapped in this metal box hurtling down some interstate road with nothing to do and plenty of time to do it. Why have I chosen this vagabond life? Maybe it has chosen me or maybe I was chosen for it. I’ve spent way too much of my life over the past decade sitting, as I am now, watching the world go by and what is left of my youth. I must be crazy, why else would I choose such a life? There must be more that makes this all worth it, makes an 18hour drive mean something. It surely isn’t financial gain because that would make me pretty stupid. Could it be my sense of adventure and desire to see the world? Maybe, in the beginning, but the world has been seen and adventures had and yet I’m still here, sitting in this van. What is it that would possess someone like myself to spend an incredile 9 full months worth of sitting in a van over the last 10 years? Part of me mourns that fact when I think about it. That’s a lot of time spent away from family, friends, life.
What’s it all worth? My life, and the lives of those I’ve been called to serve. There is fulfillment in a life of purpose. To do what you are made for, although hard sometimes, is the most fulfilling life there is. I was made to help bring a clear message of hope to a hurting world. I have to believe that by my obedience in something as small as sitting in a van for endless hours will ultimately be redeemed and used to change a life at the end of the road.
So, I will continue to sit and watch the world go by. When I get so bored I can hardly stand it, I will try to remember why I’m here after all and do my best to return thanks.
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3 comments:
you do like to sleep alot. That's one advantage of spending hours and hours in the van.....
Thanks for all you do! Without you, the guys would have a pretty hard time :) I pray for all of you by name each week, so know that we (the fans) don't forget you.
Mary Sue is so right.
You know i think we all feel like that. . .the world passing us by as we wait to go somewhere. a vagabond life or a stuck in a routine life, we're still wondering if what we've fallen into or chosen is worth it. i hear what you're saying. i wonder what possesses me to sit for 8 hours every day in front of a computer banging out information? i don't like it. . but i guess the reward comes in being able to provide for my family.
there is fulfilment in a life of purpose, true. . to do what we're made for. . i'm still trying to find out what that is?!
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